Tuesday 8 December 2009

I Drink Cups of Tea

Remember the days when we loved the so called Nu Rave and listening to Kate Nash and wishing we dress like Blue Peter Presenters? Well I certainty do.

I realised I still like the likes of the Klaxons, Teenagers, Kate Nash and all those other bands I swooned over my Uni years.

So I am afraid but I am going to post some Kate Nash Songs, as her songs reminded me of a two boy at that stage of my life. I had a lot of silly teenage mixed emotions with them both (I can say I was definitely a teenager at Uni as I started Uni at grand age of 17). It is quite sad I would probably cry if I saw them again with the background music playing a bit of Kate Nash. I am so daft and a loser.









I probably feeling a bit Kate Nash mood due to stupid school girl crush. Must learn not to lust after forbidden fruit.

P.S. I like the cartoon youtube videos of Kate Nash song. Very keepfing with the Blue Peter wannabe look. Kids presenter sheek!

Monday 7 December 2009

Ophelia



"There is a willow grows askant a brook,
That shows his hoar leaves in the glassy stream;
There with fantastic garlands did she come,
Of crow-flowers, nettles, daisies, and long purples,
That liberal shepherds give a grosser name,
But our cold maids do dead men's fingers call them:
There, on the pendent boughs her coronet weeds
Clambering to hang, an envious sliver broke,
When down her weedy trophies and herself
Fell in the weeping brook. Her clothes spread wide,
And, mermaid-like, awhile they bore her up;
Which time she chanted snatches of old tunes,
As one incapable of her own distress,
Or like a creature native and indu'd
Unto that element; but long it could not be
Till that her garments, heavy with their drink,
Pull'd the poor wretch from her melodious lay
To muddy death."



In a very odd mood and been loving my flower garland too much. Must start wearing it with long vintage dresses and curly locks again. Wished I had long gingery hair. Damn this devil's black hair.

Saturday 5 December 2009

Parisian Love and Madrid Affair.


Wearing my standard red beret I have owned since I was 16, vintage breton striped cropped jumper from Paris, Vintage Watch necklace and rosemary beads from the Vatican.

Feeling Parisian today and missing Paris. Need to visit it again for better cliché camera moments when it is not pouring with rain. Definitely need to visit Rue des Rosiers for their vintage cheap shops. I cannot say no to EUR 5 fur and EUR 10 bags.




Some of my favourite shops around the area. I regret not eating a falafel around Saint Pauls, I hear it is the best in town. More excuses for me to go!

Looks like I have to settle for Madrid next weekend. Yes girls and boys I am flying to Madrid for a long weekend with the gay husband to visit his sister. More for the sake we both need a cheap holiday and with free accommodation and cheap airline tickets we are not denying the offer.

Thursday 3 December 2009

*SPOILER * Angels Retro Sale *SPOILER*

Some will know the success of the warehouse sale in 2008 well it is sort of back again with a retro sale next year on Saturday 6th February 2010.

They had a military sale last weekend but I was unfortunately making my way to Paris buying vintage fur and dresses (one went down very well last night during a work Christmas Under 30s night. That night was deferentially as some will class as 'meat market').

SO highlight Saturday 6th February to make another trip to rummage and fight for all your retro finds.

Monday 30 November 2009

Sample This





A few sample sales I will attempt to attend if work allows me to disappear for good X amount of hours in my lunch break.

Early Bird Catches The Worm

Sorry I been off the radar again, my blogging is been very hit and miss lately. My recent updates is going to Paris for the day for my 21st however I was very unwell on my Birthday which resulted me to believe there is no God or justice.

Paris was lovely, food was nom nom, vintage shops were wonderful, however the Metro smelt like cat piss *correction* homeless people piss. I can now fully appreciate why London public transport is expensive compared to rest of Europe. We pay to keep homeless people from using the station as a public toilet.

I am afraid I managed not to take any pictures in Paris due to awful weather and the fact I wanted to die with every step we took in Paris. I will however put in due course photos of my few purchases. Next time I may need to take people who do not mind waiting for me to shop in trunks filled of five Euros fur collars.

I have today on impulse booked my flights to Madrid next weekend for a long weekend away with my Best Friend. If any one knows any vintage shops there then please let me know. :)

French Vogue two fingers at Fur activist:




Yes I wear fur but to be honest there is many dead fur items that animals have died many years ago. It is waste not to wear it. I am not buying fur from the latest Chanel collection. Therefore not promoting the fur trade to continue now but I am sorry kids real fur feels more luxurious and warmer in these Winter months. Sorry for any offence this may cause to readers.

Monday 16 November 2009

Madeline Coat of Wonders

Continuing with my massive Paris Love Affair...(these Parisian theme posts may be getting tiresome I am sensing)

Yesterday I spent my Sunday lusting over Liberty prints and heading to Beyond Retro. Long and behold I foudn this cute red petite coat with black velvet trimming, black bows on back and slight cape like structure on top. Did I mention it came with Brass Buttons? Basically I was in love right there but stupidly this was for a 5 year old and hence barely fitted me. Damn my non anorexic extreme frame. Why does no normal adult shop make gorgeous cute public school coats for likes moi?!?

This moment did reminded me of the Book/TV show Madeline. I remembered how much I loved it and the cute little dog. I think I loved it more as kid as they had really cool adventures and the thought of living in all girls convent seemed fun to me as a child. Plus they got to wear cute hats and coats. I now want my own Madeline coat and the hat as well!!!



However, I want my coat in red with black bow please.

I may now watch some Madeline alongside my Peppermint Tea. Yes Cool Granny points coming my way!

Wasted Lust

I spent past half hour trying to find way to convert a file into picture jpec file or whatever you computer science geeks call it. I am now fed up and hate technology. This is why I love my red German typewriter but FUCK ME it weighs a tonne and carrying it for 5 hours in Central London was not a good idea.

Whilst I was typing this I realised the picture I manage to convert to JPEC file is fucking too small and won't resize properly. I am getting tiresome of this post now... I may need to hire a second computer geek in this blog. Right it won't resize and I given up so enjoy the stupid small photo kids.



Most of the items below is from Monki, a Swedish high street that does very good clothes. I want the beige jumper quite alot. Everything is Monki bar the vintage bags, the blue creepers from Office, the cat mask, and the Bralet which is Topshop.

I quite like idea of using a big rope to tie around my trousers as a make shift belt. Must look into this further when I am less angry at technology.

I had enough of cropping pictures for one day (my current City Job requires me to make a lot of client friendly presentations, so my cropping skills is hitting saturation point). Now time for Peppermint tea and Chocolate covered Rice Cakes. Yumm.

Saturday 14 November 2009

J'adore

I may seem like a peeping tom on this topic but I love vintage/cliché photos of couples kissing. It is just a bit sweet. Plus in my very Parisian mood, it is keeping in theme for the fact TWO WEEKS away from my Birthday trip to Paris. I am very excited and cannot wait to venture into the wonders Paris has to offer.





I now want my own black and white cliché 'kissing moment' in Paris. Very Cliché indeed. Parisian Love Affair.

Selfridges Garage Sale

*NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEWS NEW*

Tomorrow on the Sunday 15th November, Selfridges in London are hosting a massive Garage Sale for the charity Mothers4Children. It will take place on first level Selfridges car park with 45 stall holders with likes of Elizabeth Hurley, Denise Van Outen and David Walliams as stall holders.

There will be huge discounts on celebrity donations clothes. Entrance fee is £5.

See you there kids.

Wednesday 11 November 2009

Code of Conduct

After spending an hour deciding whether my 'hello' was weird or not after a Swedish guy at work glanced at me a bit oddly as I casually said hello. In fact, I got my good gay husband to ring me and we decided I do have a funny 'hello' voice. Woe is me. I then spend the next 20 minutes practising my 'hello' to avoid any more attraction to how much different I am in world of City lifestyle.

Whilst staring at my screen at various items that will suit a person with Masters in Engineering then the likes of me, I realised how little there is on 'exact' rules on Women dress code. Men complain they HAVE to wear suits everyday and is very standard with no room to budge bar the odd crazy tie/cuff-links. Yes I agree in office wear, women do have more freedom on what to wear but there is fine line of what is acceptable and what will get men and women gossiping behind the printing machine.

In my observations, in general, there is:

A. I have Vagina but I have secret Penis inside type
The lady who dresses ultra Man-ish to show to world, yes I have a vagina but I have secret balls inside. The woman on mission to prove to world she can do whatever a man does, but a bit better. She is strong willed, does not take any shit, husky voice, drinks a dozen Starbucks Americano (none of these fruitless skinny lattes) and is often mistaken for being a dyke. These woman frank fully scare the living shit out of me, mainly as they can sense my fear and immaturity. These women are usually wearing full on suits, no skirts please (they will not sue their femininity to lure their clients in), often tie wearing and just generally unflattering clothes.

B. Tribal Escort
These women are confused by smart office wear and their normal wear clothes. They are often girls who think 'yes I want to be fashionable at work'. However, take it too OTT and end up looking like cheap escorts. They love the men and the men (well some) love her, she wears short skirts, crazy tights, hooker shoes, tight revealing tops and often has alot of random shades of blonde and brown in her hair to jazz up work look. These women probably are genuinely very nice on surface but who knows when you enter their marked male domain.

C. Class of Money
This is girl who wears suits but knows how to wear fashionable suits and dresses. They are smart office dresses, with heels but no platform hell like the Tribal Escort. They have immaculate nails, preened hair and genuinely look like they just came out of a Chanel adverts, These are the woman I inspire to be, when I have real money. These are often old money sort of woman, where most of their lovely pearls, rolex watches, Chanel dresses are all brought by Daddy's credit card or their wanker banker boyfriend. I do inspire to dress like these woman but alas my father is pauper and I have no interest in wanker bankers, as of yet.

D. Plain Jane
These girl wear smart clothes, not overly suited booted but still smart. Casually blouse with some plain black trousers and plain cardigan with plain black ballerina pumps. These girls seem to have most seal of approval by men in office. They are girl next door, not too power hungry to over shine the men's desire to be the bread winner, not too slutty where there is doubts whether she slept with her boss to get that promotion and not too stuck up middle class who will never marry below her status. These girls are just plain. I hardly notice these women. They will do fine in world of work but will never get that big break. These women are usually friendliest, due to their non threatening or over bearing any quality about themselves.

E. Rebel
The girl who does not conform to rules at all and decides the bloody hell what she deems as acceptable work wear and shoves two fingers to anyone else who says other.

F. I hear Gym calling again
The woman who is always eating salads and spends most of her lunches gym-ing away. She is the lady with heavy rucksack on her back, and wearing trainers to work whilst eating a power bar. She is the lady on the go. I do wish these woman will invest in some decent boots or flats, just as comfy as trainers!!!

Sorry for long posts but here is my ideal work office look...




Herve Leger Round Neck Bandage Dress - £920

If only I had enough money... Maybe it is time to invest in a Wanker Banker Boyfriend instead of the Arty Farty Types.

Monday 9 November 2009

Young, Free and Mossy.

I find the first photograph quite compelling and I am annoyed I cannot find my favourite photograph of two American Kids smoking with a paddling pool behind them with one of the girl's eye liner dripping down her face.








I do not in anyway condemn smoking. Everyone can make their own judgement on this matter. I am not your mother.

Rumble in the Jumble!

Yes it is this time this week for Rumble Jumble again. I cannot wait for this but unfortunately I cannot allow myself to take time off for this event, so will have to bombard my way through on the Saturday Morning. God help me if it is anything like the Angels Vintage Sale in Wembley, the queue was soo long I gave up queuing and decided to get my vintage fix in the overpriced Portbello road market.

A host of designers from Vivienne Westwood and Alexander McQueen to Chanel and Stella McCartney have donated coveted items from their collections for the ‘Gladrags & Handbags’ sale organised this month in aid of the Kids Company charity. It will be held at the Music Rooms in Central London and the admission is £2.00 on the door.

Opening times:
Friday 13 November 9am-7pm
Saturday 14 November 10am-5pm
Sunday 15 November 11am-4pm

See You there kids!

Sunday 8 November 2009

'Allo 'Allo!

Yes my Parisian theme is continuing. Watching re runs of the British Comedy Classic Allo Allo. I swear I have the oddest taste in TV ever.

Today instead of my standard Bricklane lazy days, which the weather has deemed too cold for now, I went to this quaint Bistro on Upper Street in Islington London. I highly recommend any one in North London area to go visit La Petite Aberge for their very yummy meal! I am already planning a re-visit with some Uni friends, so I can sample their moules mariniere with pomme frites. Nom nom nom!

I am disliking the Christmas Shoppers in Oxford Street and the fact working full time means no more free weekdays to go shopping in less hectic mood. This new influx of Christmas Shoppers and the standard tourists, has made it slightly impossible for me to shop for myself let alone my ever growing Birthday gifts (I am too nice and should just do last minute stop in Lush and Accessoriez, alas I care too much).

Things I want for my Parisian Dream (Which has died this week, well part of it thanks to my own cruel words. I really need to learn how to shut my trap up when needed and stop revealing the real me to Men. It is too overwhelming for anyone, even to my friends.

List of Lust


Breton stripe top


Heart Seamed Tights


AA Unisex Circle Scarf


TopShop Velvet Bodycon Dress


Topshop Jump Red Lace up Shoe

That is just somne of list of lust, there is more but getting tired and long day at work tomorrow. Weekends fly by too quickly when you work. Next minute I will be turning 25 instead of 21 this month. Woe is me of old age. Old Cat Lady theory please go away, I do not want to be left on shelf to rot. Thanks!

Monday 2 November 2009

Oui Oui Oui

I am going to Paris on 28th November for the day for my 21st Birthday. French kids or lovers of Paris please help me tell me a list of vintage shops in Paris?

I am having a major love affair with all things French, from stripy tops to my red beret to fur. Love Affair I tell thee! I will post something more substantial to represent how much I love all things French. I have even stopped buying cheddar cheese in replacement of Edam and Gouda (I am well aware these are Dutch cheeses, but I couldn't deal with French Cheeses and thought Dutch is close enough to France) and I started listening to some Bridgette Bardot and Yelle & Uffie. Oooo La La!



I am obessed with Miss Dior Cherie Advert, so much so, I have spent four hours watching this advert over and over. I want my Parisian Dream to be EXACTLY like the advert. I want the quaint dress, eating yummy cakes and the pastel Laura Ashley coloured balloons.


I WANT TO BE THE GIRL ABOVE!!! C'est Adorable! (You can see I did not study French GCSE, stupidly took the manly language of German.)

All I now need is that French Man to romance me.

Team Evil

Sorry for late post, I have been busy in my full time City Job and catching up with old friends. I am a rubbish blogger. Bad Times.

I hope everyone had a frightful Halloween. Mine consisting of rollover hangovers from previous drinking sessions the week before. I realised I definitely cannot drink during work days, as I cannot say no to free drinks. Must put that on my to do list, must learn to say No to free drinks. I have been away from blog world, my already basic HTML skills have gone to non existent HTML skills, so apologies in advance for poor posting here.

Here is some images from my halloween, I tried to stay away from overly sexy sexy sexy outfits. Why does halloween allow girls to dress like hookers even in the most bizarre outfits, this ranges from sexy pumpkins, sexy serial killer, sexy vampire, sexy bumblebee?!? Forgiven for any friends of mine who do read this, I did dress as bumble bee but it was nothing but sexy. I resembled a 10 year old and anyone thinking I am sexy bumble bee would of been a paedophile.

My dress up consisted of alot of fake blood, fake skin (yes you heard me right!), face putty, knives and pretending to be passion of the christ?!?








Yes I am aware we got carried away with Knifey type pictures. Plus my eyes are a bit crazy in some, though I think we did it in true halloween style of scary on slight horror film style. Who cares as I love the Gothic Vintage look.

Wednesday 16 September 2009

Boudicca of Vogue

Grace Coddington, Vogue's creative director and former model, is my new hero in fashion world after watching The September Issue. For me her utter creative genius shown in her innovative flair in her photo shoots and even Ms Wintour herself acknowledges the creative brilliance that is Grace Coddington.


Went to Dalston last weekend to watch this Documentary which I have literally been counting the days till since I found out it's existence, and readers you will not be disappointed. Yes Anna is portrayed as a bit of an Ice Queen but it is understandable considering she is Editor in Chief of world leading fashion magazine that is Vogue and to be honest she is damn good at what she does. The film has some rather awkward moments between Anna and her daughter where she obviously forgotten the Law firm her daughter was interning and her icy stare when her daughter said she has no interest into becoming a fashion editor but instead a top class lawyer. There was another funny moment for me is at the start of film a journalist describe Anna as the most powerful and influential woman of fashion and how she is god like etc to André Leon Talley who is sitting right next to Anna. The journalist seems to be unaware or maybe too aware she was in earshot of Anna. Another favourite moment is Grace is on site in French 17th Century house shooting for another editorial and the model who is wearing a very very tight corset is pondering whether to eat a fruit pastry. She does not for fear of not fitting into the corset but after the shoot, you see her angling her way through for that pastry, loving every bite it appears.

For me Grace stole the show with her creative mastery in the 1920s shoot and the re-shooting of the blocked colours editorial piece. I felt sorry for Grace's favourite piece of the group of models having picnic with dogs in the 1920s shoot, being axed by Anna so quickly in process. Grace, I would of brought that print any day to have displayed in my house. I loved the arguments of whether the camera man, who was used in one of the shots for the blocked colours piece, if his ponch belly should be retouched to make him similar. Anna protesting his stomach gets retouched and suggest gym for the cameraman whilst Grace having hr say of NO retouching mainly as she correctly says Models are already skinny and perfect, you do not have to be.



Some of the most funniest moments in film are provided by André Leon Talley the Editor-at-Large, especially in the scene below where he is dripped in Louis Vuitton, so much so it begs to wonder if he is burning any of those calories at all. Maybe he loses more when he making dent in the old AMEX card.



Another favourite quote from him is at the start of film where he proclaims to the fashion world that "It's a famine of beauty, honey. My eyes are starving for beauty!" I laughed so much when he said those words. He did look distressed when saying it that Vera Wang had to calm him down.

I realised I ranted too much on this post and if you got this far well done! If not I hope you just watched the Youtube clip as it is the one of the most amusing moments in the film.

Vagina me Boots

Last year there was the over the knee high boots from Stella McCartney but not it is getting as some blogges have rightfully names "Vagina High" boots. Oh no the photo below are not ridiculously skinny leather trousers but boots.


Fuck knows what sort of bottom half you are meant to wear especially in British Winter. I am thinking American Apparel may have influx order for black hotpants for any rich Chelsea kids to purchase this trend. I do however like them for novelty, look at me I am more hooker then Juila Roberts thigh high boots in Pretty Woman.

Then again I am no Julia Roberts and I believe the novelty will worn off a little plus prospect of removing the boots off after a night out (they are definitely not suited for my work wear attire, I will get tongues waging at work) scares me abit. However, definitely all eyes will be on me with these Vagina high boots. Hmm.. toss between practicality or getting WOW factor...hmm...

Monday 14 September 2009

Late Lust

I swear my taste is slow on up take. I now really want this last Autumn Kate Moss panther dress but I am quite sure I will never get my mitts on it unless some keen person will like to sell me their one??



I want to wear this with my granny lace up boots and my blazer with fur collar. Phooey. I have become quite obsessed with see through mesh clothing mixed with normal cotton fabrics.

Sleepless in Hampstead

Sorry for the lack of posting but been very busy with work and have not had time to update this blog. Last weekend I got my old Hoxton neighbour back in town, went to two house warming parties, Brick Lane shopping and saw The September Issue (I will blog about this later as too hilarious quotes to mention). This has been a good weekends which I have not had for awhile. Whilst I type this I stupidly got curious and saw pictures of past boy with his under age girlfriend I got fobbed off for. All I have to say well done for finding someone really obviously skinny wrench posh but boring girl who probably has no backbone, you cunt. Yes I am scorn woman but I act irrational in life so please allow it. I been told my extremity of my emotions makes rather comical reading, so lets hope you laugh at my moment of bitchyness or you think I need help. I probably do.

The title of blog really has to do with a fact a friend who will remain nameless, cannot control his alcohol intake and always passes out around 9/10pm at parties. Sheer comedy value, me and my friends have decided to deface his face with a Sharpie marker pen.

My friend drinking the most awful wine from the corner shop.

Before he started to lose it all.


He is drifting now and falling asleep on my friend.

The Sharpie Pen got him.



Yes ladies and gentlemen he is very cheap!

Awful face of mine. I should never smile with teeth.


He was not happy when he woke up later on. Next time I say pile objects on his face.